Jeff’s Story

Dear Amy,

My long ago girlfriend was taking a medication that caused horrific birth defects - frequently incompatible with life for the fetus, possibly causing tremendous and/or fatal complications for her.

We had a contraceptive failure and she got pregnant. We did everything right and it still happened.

On top of that, I was completely broke, living hand to mouth and with considerable assistance from the same girlfriend. I tried my absolute hardest to contribute and I just couldn’t keep up.

We also fought a lot, and I was on the receiving end of what I now recognize as emotional abuse.

She was also occasionally physically violent with me as well. I was able to recognize *that* as abuse at the time. I was starting to shout back that one day I wasn’t gonna take it anymore, and I’m so glad that I never slipped down that slope.

We were tremendously lucky to be able to have an abortion safely, discreetly and affordably with dignity for everyone involved.

There were no screaming protestors outside the clinic, nobody to wave horrific photos, spit, or make us wonder if it was worth living in a world that could produce this kind of hatred.

I think about it all the time, what it would be like if she were forced to carry that baby to term. I think about being far from home and locked into an abusive relationship, forced into poverty and raising a terribly disabled child in a violent, rage-filled house.

And until a few months ago, I was able to be glad that this was possible for other people.

Abortion access isn’t just a women’s issue. It’s a human issue.

We haven’t experienced a tragic loss of women’s rights today, we’ve experienced a collective loss of human rights.

Jeff